Laugh Out Loud: Joke to Light Up Your Weekend

A duck waddled into a pub and asked for a beer and a ham sandwich. The bartender blinked and said, “Wait a minute—you’re a duck!” “That’s pretty clear,” the duck replied. “And you talk!” the bartender exclaimed. “And you listen well,” said the duck. “Now, about that beer and sandwich?” A duck in a construction worker’s outfit sitting at a bar eating a sandwich. “Oh, right, sorry,” the bartender said, pouring the beer. “We don’t see many ducks in here. What brings you by?”

“I’m working on that construction site nearby,” the duck said. “I’m a plasterer.” The bartender looked surprised, but said nothing as the duck pulled out a newspaper and started reading. The duck read, ate, and left. He did the same thing every day for two weeks. A duck sitting at a bar reading a newspaper. Then the circus came to town.

The circus manager stopped by the pub, and the bartender said, “Hey, you’re with the circus, right? I know a duck who’d be a sensation in your act! He talks, drinks beer, eats sandwiches, reads the newspaper… he’s incredible!” “Really?” said the circus manager, handing over his card. “Tell him to give me a call.” The next day, when the duck came in, the bartender said, “Hey Mr. Duck, I think I found you a fantastic job—with great pay.” “I’m always open to good opportunities,” said the duck. “Where is it?”

“At the circus,” the bartender replied. A circus in a field. “The circus?” said the duck. “Yep,” said the bartender. “The circus?” the duck asked again. “The one with the big tent?” “Exactly!” said the bartender. “With caged animals and people living in trailers?” the duck asked. “That’s the one,” said the bartender. “And the tent’s made of thick fabric with a hole in the top?” the duck asked. “That’s right!” said the bartender. The duck frowned and said, “Why would they need a plasterer?”

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