A Horrible Book. A blonde stormed up to the front desk of the library and, screaming, said, “I have a complaint!”
“How can i help you?” said the librarian looking up at her. “I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible!”

Puzzled by her complaint, the librarian asked: “What was wrong with it?”

“It had way too many characters and there was no plot!” said the blonde.

“Ahhhhh,” nodded the librarian. “So you’re the person who took our phone book.”

A guy asked a girl in a university library:
“Do you mind if I sit beside you?”

The girl answered with a loud voice: “I DON’T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!!!”

All the students in the library started staring at the guy and he was truly embarrassed. After a couple of minutes, the girl walked quietly to the guy’s table and said: “I study psychology and I know what a man is thinking.

I guess you felt embarrassed, right?”

The guy responded with a loud voice: “$500 FOR ONE NIGHT!? THAT’S TOO MUCH!!!”

And all the people in the library looked at the girl in shock. The guy whispered in her ears: “I study law, and I know how to screw people.”

A not-so-smart person
walks up to the counter and says: “I’d like a cheeseburger, fries and a diet coke.”

The man behind the counter says “Look around!

This is a LIBRARY!”

“Oh, how silly of me.” says the person. She then begins whispering, “I’d like a cheeseburger, fries and a diet coke…”

————————————————————————————————————————————————-

A police car pulled up in front of Grandma Bessie’s house
A police car pulled up in front of Grandma Bessie’s house, and out stepped Grandpa Morris. The officer politely explained, “Ma’am, your husband said he got lost in the park and couldn’t find his way home.”

Grandma Bessie stared at Morris and said, “Lost?

You’ve been going to that park for 30 years! How’d you get lost today?”

Leaning in close so the officer couldn’t hear, Grandpa whispered, “I wasn’t lost. I was just too tired to walk home.”

A policeman pulls over an old man driving a pickup truck
A policeman pulls over an old man driving a pickup truck with the bed overflowing with ducks.

The story doesn’t end here — it continues on the next page.
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